Episode Transcript
Gary (00:00)
All right. Okay, we'll get going. Hey everybody. It's Gary LeBlanc here with three time Paralympian marathon winner. You have a long rap sheet, Josh. So introducing Josh Cassidy, he can give a little bit more about himself shortly, but I've known Josh for, I don't know, 15 years maybe, I don't know. Time kind of, time gets away from us.
Um, and you know, Josh and I have stayed in contact this whole time and usually it's getting into the weeds. We both been on a bit of a almost synchronous journey these past 10 years, 12 years. So we've shared a lot of call the struggles and a lot of the wins and a lot of the kind of setting your head straight. So we figured with all those conversations, we would get into limiting beliefs. So welcome Josh Cassidy.
Josh (00:57)
Thanks so much buddy, looking forward to this. Yeah.
Gary (00:58)
Yeah. Um, like when you talk about your life, as far as what you remember, like what stands out the most, like what, what's kind of the cold notice that people would need to know about you that would be disproportionately overcoming, let's say.
Josh (01:16)
Sure, Cole's notes, born with cancer in my spine was partially paralyzed. Those were very early building blocks, very early challenges that I had to learn to overcome. Taught me a lot about resilience, taught me the benefit of challenges and embracing those challenges with open arms because they're there to facilitate learning and growth. And I've just always loved this.
spiritual journey, this journey to try and become our best self, you know, tap into our unlimited potential, see what it is that's possible. And that's why I love sport is it's, it's a microcosm for life. And that's what made me dive in there. But I'm also equally passionate about creative pursuits, painting and music and writing. And so that's, it's a little bit about
Yeah, what I'm, what I'm into and yeah, I've always just loved chatting and I said, you know, looking forward to this. I look forward to every time that we get together to chat because we just, yeah, we, like you said, we get into the weeds. We, we, we can just chat for hours about life philosophy, you know, meaning mindset, all kinds of different things. Um, so yeah, it's, it's, it's always a pleasure. It's always fun and always come out of our chats, just feeling.
Gary (02:21)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (02:42)
Just feeling better, yeah.
Gary (02:44)
Yeah, no, I get it. You know, I, I joke about this all the time, but, uh, you know, misery loves company, whatever. Um, but, uh, I call it a kinship in the struggle. And I like kinship cause you know, we're almost like brothers and regardless of the net absolute outcome of situations, we were, I'd say disproportionately exposed to a lot of.
Josh (02:58)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (03:13)
you know, a lot of chaos in the past 12 years, a lot of opportunities to feel all the feels. And, um, I think what was kind of unique about it was that we were feeling very similar things at very similar times in our own right. You know, um, I was starting the company and, oh, I've told that story a million times, but, uh, the greater the opportunity to evolve.
Josh (03:16)
Mm -hmm.
Definitely.
Gary (03:43)
the greater the resistance, right? So that was a, you know, yeah, I was saying we're going to use metaphors a lot this episode, but it's almost like your gut, you know, if you start getting distress and you start to have to change, you start needing to change your diet, you can't do it all at once, right? There's a certain, if you try to do it all at once, there's a certain,
Josh (03:46)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Gary (04:09)
almost in congruency with the food you're eating and your gut, right? They just don't mix and it'll just make it worse. And it's a little bit when you have these massive spiritual and life changes without any time to acclimatize, you know, you're kind of thrown into something.
Josh (04:26)
Sometimes there's a bit of a, yeah, there's a bit of a leg for the new calibration to kind of take precedence for sure. Yeah. And like you said, with your, you know, with your, your journey with, with the business and, and mine with athletics, you know, there was lots of times where, you know, we're both banging our heads against the wall with some of the, the challenges that we were coming up with, like, you know, those moments where you're wondering, you know, why am I doing this? But at some point it's like,
Gary (04:30)
Mm -hmm. Exactly.
Josh (04:54)
you know, we had talked about it's like, there's no as much understanding why am I doing this? Although there is that's that's a very positive reflection to have. But it's more accepting the Yeah, this is the path right now until I know that it's not in my gut. Because this is definitely just what I what I what I feel I'm supposed to do and what's still motivating me. And it's more just figuring out then why do the certain challenges keep coming up and, and how are we getting past them? And how do you break?
Gary (05:07)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (05:23)
patterns. And so over this 1215 years or whatever, we've known each other, getting to see that progress over time, you know, the long term, the big picture evolution of what's happened has been special as well, when you get to have a kinship and a brotherhood of with someone that, yeah, there's alignment. And we also, with all the alignment, what I've just always appreciated is
Gary (05:36)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Josh (05:52)
the difference in obviously our perspectives and who we are as humans as well and what we can bring to each other that is different. So I've always appreciated that too.
Gary (06:04)
Mm hmm. You know, you said it, there's a certain inertia behind someone's words when there's a lot of trust and you know, there's a lot of respect and you know, there's a lot of compassion. So regardless of, you know, how you see certain things and you know, the truth is, you know, the, the things we really do see eye to eye or are aligned on are really the kind of the essential amino acids, you know, they're the,
Josh (06:11)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm. Oh, totally.
Gary (06:34)
They're right. They're the things we need. And then, you know, the beauty is it's impossible to see everything the same way. But when you respect and have compassion, et cetera, et cetera, their words mean something, right? And if you're open and curious, it can leave a, it can leave a big impression. You know what I mean? Like, you know, I trust this guy. Okay. He thinks this way. Okay. That's interesting. You know,
Josh (06:42)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
It's sort of like a left brain right brain approach really, you know, it's, we both have our own full brains, but and they both, you know, provide but it's with us and our dynamic and our conversation is it sort of that, that dynamic as well, right? Where, yeah, taking the two different sides and approaching them together to become one, come some some kind of resolution. Yeah.
Gary (07:02)
Mm -hmm.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no. Yeah, it's super cool. It fills in the blanks. And one of the things that I lean on you a lot about, and I talked about it at the beginning, is limiting beliefs, right? Which is the point of kind of the conversation. But in terms of, and I tried to spend some time with this, because it's such a pop culture word, limiting beliefs.
Josh (07:34)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (07:48)
So I tried to spend time with it and I'm like, okay, what does that really mean? Okay. And I think about hitting a wall, you know, and when I hit a certain wall, it's the same narrative when I hit that wall, right? Little things might change, but kind of that's what I see as limiting beliefs. I see it as kind of the voices in your head when you do hit those walls. And that seems obvious, but I guess what it, it tells me deep down and I want to.
get your take on this is how much it sabotages your potential even if you go forward, right? So, you know, I think it's almost infinite. Like I think it's black and white, somebody who has full belief in themselves and what they're doing versus somebody who has a little bit of doubt. So anyway, that's how I see limiting beliefs.
Josh (08:39)
Totally. Yeah, it's beliefs is everything.
feel like, you know, what I what I love about sport again, is this it's this great opportunity to see such direct results. And, you know, do you think someone who's winning a race winning an event is thinking, I can't do this, this isn't going to happen. No, like, to be able to win and have success, there has to be a seed of belief and confidence planted within and in this 3d experience that we're in. And we have all this.
stuff put on us from our experiences, you know, especially from our childhood and early years, but all through life that form what our beliefs are, and eventually become limiting. So that's, this is some of the work that I love to do for myself and then help others with and in coaching or speaking and helping identify those patterns that keep popping up. What are these same? Am I hitting this exact same wall again and again and again? Okay. Um,
This has something to do with me here. What's going on with me? Why do I keep hitting this wall? And what is my mindset on this topic? Or what is my perspective? What is my belief with this thing, person, challenge, whatever it is, area in life. And there's so many, you know, different possibilities of what, what that is, but really what it comes down to is,
figuring out what is a negative perception that is holding you back in some form or another. And I went through a phase in my life too, where, you know, it was sort of, you know, certain people were like, oh, Josh is silver lining and blah, blah, blah. And, you know, we, we, we have to, we have to be aware of what the reality of our situation is for sure.
But in order to create an external shift, there also has to be an internal shift. That's imperative, it's important. And it's not just like you just sit there and belief like everything's gonna be different and just sit around and wait. No, the action component is massive as well. And like we talked about earlier, there's a time factor. There's sometimes a bit of a lag to see.
Gary (11:01)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Josh (11:14)
a shift or a change. And a great metaphor again that I just thought of earlier this week was around this subject was like, in the middle of the night, wanting it to be sunny. I mean, you're not just gonna sit there and be say like, Oh, I believe it's sunny, it is sunny outside. And then all of a sudden, the sun's just gonna pop up and it's gonna appear there's there's a 3d reality happening where the sun is, you know, on the other side of the planet shifting.
But if you're thinking that it's sunny out, you're closing your eyes and you're imagining it, your body will actually start to have a chemical change within it because of the reality that you're experiencing internally. You can just believe that all night until it hits morning and who could open your eyes and the sun is there eventually. You could travel to the other side of the world and change your reality and try and chase down the sun. There's so many different ways you can...
Gary (11:57)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (12:12)
you can look at this metaphor, but ultimately it is having that belief and that knowing that the sun is here, there is a sunny day that exists, it's going to come into my reality, and there is a bit of a time shift and change. But the contrast to that is if you're just thinking, oh, it's always dark out, it's always dark, it's always dreary, so like those people aren't going to notice the sun when it is out, you know, they're not going to talk about it.
Um, it's just, it's just a very simple metaphor. I think that just the, yeah, just the power of reframing and, and the power of the mind. And, you know, like, for example, when you're, when you wake up from a dream and it feels so real in your body, you lose somebody, you get in an accident, you, whatever it is, and you wake up in your body is having that, that physical reaction that as if that experience actually.
Gary (12:42)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (13:11)
took place. It didn't happen in reality. It just, again, just shows the power of the mind and our internal reality and how that affects and shapes our external reality. So it's this constant awareness that is so important to be aware of what your internal thoughts are, what your internal beliefs are, so that you can redirect, reframe, refocus. It's just a
It's just a continuous attention that needs to happen. Consciousness.
Gary (13:48)
I think, yeah, I think for me, it connected at the end when you said awareness, because it can be a very judgmental situation. Um, somebody gets to a place and they have this thing of self -talk. It's not going to change tomorrow. It might not change next month. It might not change in 10 years, you know, it might not change forever. So if that's, it's almost like DNA.
Right? It's almost like you have a, you believe that your DNA is your outcome, right? Versus epigenetics where you believe you can influence that. Um, if somebody doesn't believe they can influence something, um, if they don't believe, um, that unless they start thinking this way right now, they're failing. Um, that's a vicious, that's a vicious circle. So where I, you know,
Josh (14:23)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (14:46)
where I kind of spend some time is cause I have negative self -talk. So the awareness means I'm noticing it. Okay. And noticing it is basically 99%. Right. So you notice it, you spend time with it. I think, you know, what you would like to be feeling and you would like to know how to reframe it. And I think you'll get better at it. Right. But I also want people to feel and.
I want to believe myself that regardless of this absolute amount of negative self -talk, if I really want to do something, I'll get it done. Like I'll be able to succeed, um, regardless of if I still have these recriminating thoughts and these limiting beliefs holding me down. Because I would say in general, if I'm being honest,
from an optimism perspective, it's really funny. In some ways I'm a 10, in some ways I'm a five, you know, it, it, it super depends, right? Um, like when I think of optimistic health wise, I'm like a 10 on 10, like I, you know, um, but in areas that are more emotional and spiritual, um, I think I would tend to more than often, um, hold myself back, right?
And so anyway, it's I guess it's a chicken before the egg thing. And I, I would just like to believe that I don't necessarily have to feel those positive thoughts right now.
Josh (16:16)
Yeah. The chicken and the egg thing is interesting analogy actually, too, because this is something that I wanted to get to eventually. As we chatted before a little bit about the current reality in pulp culture and just just be positive and everything is fine without actually going into finding the root of the cause, which I know is super important. And
I think it gets to a point though as well where...
I do believe that you actually have to be able to figure out, look at the past, look at the patterns, see where your history is, where did those beliefs or those patterns start to form to be able to unpack those, heal certain things if needed, know how to reframe, redirect and refocus, and a lot of that does just have to do with repetition and practice. I think for myself and with...
yourself what you're talking about and being being hard on yourself. One of the things if you are actually in the work, if you are actually doing that, it gets to a certain point where the work itself is so heavy. And you actually just need to just be sometimes there are times where you need chicken before the egg you need to just have the egg before the chicken and just let it go just be.
Gary (17:33)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm, exactly. Yeah.
Josh (17:41)
Focus on what feels good. Do something that feels good. Get outside, get your mind off of it instead of trying to force change the internal thoughts, which has been something of myself that I've had to learn to do. Great first that I had the awareness, great that I knew how to learn how to unpack it, pack it, redirect, refocus. But then really the easiest way to do that and actually implement that shift as well is then to be able to just move forward and just being.
by doing something that feels good and with an alignment with yourself that there isn't resistance on. If there's something that you're feeling resistance in with your life, there are certain things that are important that we have to work through that, yeah, maybe may feel tough and challenging and difficult. And I think the newer generation has a hard time with that, with resilience and pushing through in this reality that we have where there's so much instantaneous gratification.
But there is something that to be said on the flip side and it all comes down for a balance of, yeah, of just being, of just doing what feels good and following passion and flow. And that internal shift in energy creates a better space, a more fertile ground for you to plant those seeds with a new positive belief.
Gary (18:57)
Mm hmm. No, I love that. You know, it's and I agree, obviously, you know, I talked about this a lot. I always say you're winning, you know, just in the classic sense of the word, you're winning when you're noticing, you know, that's when you started to win. Because it's impossible to predict how many notice things are going to have to happen for you to think differently. The deeper the impression, the tougher to unwind, right, the tougher to rewire.
Josh (19:14)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (19:27)
So I believe that. So I focus on the process. I know this oscillates between people. I'm a process guy, 1000%. It doesn't mean that I don't have a North star, but I definitely let that North star go, which is a little bit the point here. You know, you mentioned letting go and just being, well, that's why I let the North star go. You know, I set a really deep intention and I feel it.
I internalize it as much I can and then I let it go. And there's very little feedback on how I'm doing versus that North Star. I'm more really auditing my process. So that's how I, you know, from a limiting release perspective, I just want to do the things that I know are going to help me notice. And then, you know, you know, the river will flow. Right. So, you know, that's a.
Yeah, I agree with everything you said, like, there's, I think, for me, when we talk about this, the disconnect is, is the motivation almost, behind what I want to do. And, and I'll kind of like everything's about motivation and friction, right? So the motivation is so predicated on a broken system, in my opinion, you know,
Josh (20:43)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (20:50)
Um, our environment is you could argue it's diseased from a, from a social, a sociological perspective. We're not in a good place. So, you know, your motivation, if you want to be successful is, is based on this kind of disease environment, let's say. So I don't want to do the X, Y, and Zed. I don't believe X, Y, and Zed. So that's also part of holding me back. So I'm not really as motivated as I could be either.
Josh (20:58)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (21:20)
Um, so the point being for me, from a motivation perspective, I got a, the training is on training myself to see what success really means and how that feels and to start looking at all the ways I've changed and use that as a motivation. Does that, does that resonate with your approach at all?
Josh (21:36)
Mm -hmm.
Totally. Yeah, totally. I mean, people think that just because you know, like, for example, when when big races or whatever that I just sit there and think about them all the time. No, I got to force myself to remember the positive things that I've done to remember, you know, and put everything in a bigger picture perspective. We talk about, you know, negative, negative thoughts or doubts or motivations that come in that are that are challenging, or there might be some resistance.
I mean, it's kind of a beautiful thing. I mean, again, with the sport analogy, you know, you don't make a team, you don't win a race, you whatever, you know, it gives fuel to the fire to to one who put in more effort to want to prove something. Really, that's a little bit more pursuit of ego. And I feel like when there is something and this is something that I've learned, and I'm learning is if there is something that you're having troubles with motivation with,
or even you aren't having troubles with motivation with, is it coming from something that...
is this healing something from the past maybe if it's a money thing and this motivation for money and it's you know because you know my past I had money blocks or grew up with with with very little money so have money blocks that motivates you to maybe want to make money but the energy and resistance around that is high and then you know the motivation becomes difficult at times and there's this resistance so it's one of those things that just is a conscious choice you know maybe part of your path and your journey
is using that as motivation to create a new reality that's different from what was before. At the same time, I think that there is, which I do feel is quite often a little bit more on the ego side of things, but if you're following something that is truly just in passion, the motivation is very easy. The motivation is easy if there is a passion there for it.
Gary (23:37)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (23:42)
without resistance. And that's just something that I often reflect upon in those moments of searching for motivation to do something.
Gary (23:57)
Right. Yeah. You know, it's, uh, you know, I'm just reflecting on everything you were talking about. And, you know, I think the answer lies in where you, how you define success, where you're over flexed in your definition of success. You know what I mean? Like, I think you said it, is it only money? Like, is it this mad pursuit of money? Is this a mad pursuit of fame?
Right? Is it this mad pursuit of validation maybe right in a certain field? Like the answer is really where that disproportionate amount of focus is when you look at success because success is so nuanced. You know what I mean? It's success is about a feeling. It's about balance, right? It's about your purpose. Whatever you want to define is that it's about meeting your needs, but everything again in balance, right? Um, and.
Josh (24:30)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (24:54)
when you kind of over flex in certain areas, I think that's where the answer is, you know, and I'm over flex on the limiting beliefs in very specific areas that I recognize.
Josh (25:05)
Totally. When you mentioned the broken system, right? So where is your motivation a product of the broken system? You know, where you're trying to prove something where you're trying to gain more fame, more money to have worth and there are people that do have success from that. There are people that become millionaires and billionaires from this broken system that's fueled that motivation or won major races or become an incredible athlete. But I think it's only sustainable to a certain
degree. And I think it also is a it's also a I think it also shifts with time and with age as well. Like I think it's a very common thing with athletes in general that you will see a pattern where young athletes are full of fuel, full of motivation, you know, full of confidence, everything to prove nothing to lose. And, you know, have a lot of success. And then there's kind of
you can see that there's often a bit of an ego death. If you've like gotten that thing and you realize it's still not enough, why are you doing it? There was a big shift for myself where it just was like, I'm not doing this to prove anything to anyone else or myself anymore. It was about falling in love again with the sport and what I'm passionate about. And where there's resistance for me is the system and the things that, and I've just chose not to focus my energy on fighting.
those things in the broken system so that I can focus on the passion and the enjoyment more. And now my success is defined by something different more than just winning the gold medal. Sure, that's a goal. I haven't gotten the Paralympic gold medal yet. Sure, it's a goal this this summer, you know, could be the last opportunity or whatever. And that would be a great thing to prove to myself that I can do to see what I can do. But I also know that that it ultimately
doesn't define me. There's so much more to my life and the day in day out and the personal challenges or what's important. My son that I have now is the most important thing in my life. Like the perspective and the framing of it just shifts. However, that being said with less ego, ego is always there, it's still there, but with less ego, less motivation of something to prove and all of that and just doing it for the passion and enjoyment and alignment.
Gary (27:02)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (27:28)
I've been able to have a lot of great success. I've had a personal best this year with less training and arguably more stress that I wouldn't have been able to cope with years ago in the same way. Um, just because of the experience that I've gained in reframing and redirecting and, you know, re challenging or re channeling energy in certain ways that, um, yeah, it's just beautiful.
Gary (27:37)
Hmm.
You know, it's almost like a curing, you know, as we age and it, you know, it doesn't mean, Hey, look at us. We're all wise and old, but, uh, but just over time, you're going to kind of feel almost everything, everything under the curve of despair and joy is going to kind of be colored in. Right. And, you know, that universe of all these different things that can happen to you starts to get filled. But again,
Josh (28:04)
never stops.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (28:25)
the universe can expand, you know, the more you have on the line, the more you're going to feel, you know, and I think for a guy like you, when I look at you, you know, I think just from an athletic perspective, you're forced to feel everything, you know, you've been through everything. I know your story, you know, you won the Boston Marathon, London Marathon, and you know, all the, you felt as good as you can feel, you know, you had the world record out in Boston and, but then, you know,
you missing the Olympics four years ago, like, fuck, that was tough on me. Let alone you. And I kind of know directionally how that feels a little bit, you know, like, fuck man, I'm going through shit like that in a different way. You know, during those 11 years, a few times you've been there. So I think when you feel all the feels, it's inevitable. So I agree with you.
Josh (28:59)
Hahaha
Gary (29:19)
I think when you feel everything, you become less scared of everything. You know, you kind of seen that, you know, I know what that story looks like. And I know I'm not going to be, you know, living in a tent under a bridge because, you know, nobody said your self talk is logical. Right. And I think that's why it's also super cool when you can go through something so congruent with someone. Um, because you need to be hearing what you would say to yourself when you're going through the things.
Josh (29:35)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (29:48)
And when you trust someone who has all those essential amino acids, I can trust on that mirror, right? And you need that mirror. It's almost like that emergency kit I made when shit goes real sideways. What do you do? Well, phone a friend is one of them. You know what I mean? And it's because you do need a dose of call it positive self -talk. You know, we were jazzing jamming about positive psychology earlier. We can, we can chat a bit about that, but.
Josh (29:56)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (30:15)
You know, you do need that person to expose other possibilities because the only ones you see aren't really going to serve you, you know.
Josh (30:25)
Yeah, exactly. Sometimes you need if that if that judgment if that vision is just too clouded if that head is just too heavy and dark. Having a third person perspective to bring in that that that reframing that retarget that you can't do on your own is massive. And yeah, I feel the same way.
Gary (30:47)
You know, it's just... Luna!
Josh (30:51)
Luna thinks I'm there.
Gary (30:54)
Luna? Luna! Shut up! Luna! Stop it!
Josh (31:00)
This is this is where we just we just our way through this
Gary (31:01)
Lona?
Luna, get the hell over here. Come on.
Get over here.
Get over here, Luna!
Don't worry, this is an easy edit for you.
Josh (31:14)
My sorry.
Gary (31:16)
easy edit for me. I forget the last thing you said though.
Josh (31:22)
I just said, um, Oh, about the reframing, uh, like a third party when it's too clouded. Yeah.
Gary (31:27)
Oh, good, good, good. Oh, yeah.
here 32 I'm a fucking producer
Okay. So let's, let's, uh, deep dive into reframing a bit because I like that conversation. Reframing. It's funny. You say, you know, sometimes when you wake up from a dream, you felt that dream, obviously, you know, you wake up and you're full of catecholamines and you're stressed. Um, you know, I find the same thing happens from the perspective. You know what? I'm going to have to start over if I can.
Luna was distracting me.
Josh (32:05)
No problem.
Gary (32:05)
and Luna, man.
All right, 33, perfect.
Okay. Just a sec. Sorry, I just have to find my thread. Feel, feel, feel. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, perfect. Okay. Okay, Josh, so you were digging into reframing and I just wanna deep dive into reframing a bit. And, you know, reframing really is about feeling different, you know?
Josh (32:17)
diving into reframing.
Gary (32:34)
It's thinking different, but you immediately feel different. And you brought up that example of dreaming and you literally feel that when you wake up. Well, it's kind of the same thing with reframing, right? It is an instant feeling. Now, again, it could be very fleeting because as soon as you reframe, oftentimes our ego is going to want to come back and change that narrative. So that's where mindfulness actually is super effective because when you can meditate and train yourself to come back,
It's that battle between these negative voices kind of sabotaging your reframe because I like what you mentioned about the feeling because I think it is all about that. Like you literally feel completely different after a reframe. And sometimes it really sticks. Like sometimes it's almost like you're hypnotized and you do a quick reframe and you're like, Oh Jesus, like, like I completely feel different.
Josh (33:19)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (33:31)
Um, and sometimes, like I said, it bounces back, but you know what? Sometimes it sticks.
Josh (33:36)
Yeah, I think that's also where the two punch reframing and being comes in, the action component, right? So in the dream scenario situation, you wake up, you feel, and maybe you have sweats, maybe you're actually literally shaky because of what you just experienced and you know that it's not real, but all of that physical change is there. So yeah, for me then it's the meditation and maybe there's some kind of specific guided meditation that I know where to go to.
to be able to reframe to shift. It's going and getting in a freezing cold shower because that will help change the physical chemical makeup right now that's presiding. And it's the same with racing, it's the same with sport. You know, if something happened maybe that's throwing you off your game right before you're supposed to go in for a race or a match or whatever it is and okay.
you need to reframe whatever just happened. Maybe you forgot something. Maybe it was like, maybe it was like your routine energy gel or bar or something like that, or a piece of equipment or, you know, being able to, yeah, being able to reframe that and then, and then just go be just then go start doing the warmup process, going through the rest of the motions and.
Gary (34:46)
something through you off.
Josh (34:58)
That's where in this whole conversation we have that both elements are so important, you know, you just sit there and think that dream wasn't real, that dream wasn't real, that dream wasn't real, like there has to be a moving forward process of being to be able to actually integrate and create a shift in your emotional fields. And the same with if you just do if you just do the one, if you just go and start going, there's going to be that subconscious.
Gary (35:12)
Hmm.
Sure. Yeah.
Josh (35:28)
Feeling in there and the sleep scenario when the race scenario whatever it is It's happening in your life and vice versa if you're just sitting there thinking about it all day trying to shift it by just thinking about it Your time is going by and your life and reality Isn't isn't going anywhere?
Gary (35:43)
Hmm. I love that. Um, and I know this might be a little too simple, brother, but you almost think of, um, having your emergency kit, you know, everybody should have an emergency bag at home. I don't have one. We have to invest in one. Now Emma's coming. I'm going to have a little girl. So I definitely need an emergency kit because shit's going to go sideways in the next five years for sure.
Josh (35:56)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Hehehehehe
Gary (36:13)
So, um, I definitely, I definitely, uh, need an emergency kit. So if you think of emergency kit for those moments where you're stuck, right. And you do the reframe. So now you do the reframe and now you read kind of that emergency kit. And I was just thinking about it. I know it might sound basic, but what I want to do is I want to write something to myself and my words of what I would say.
to me when shit goes sideways, but if I wasn't emotionally invested in that moment, right? So, um, and it could be something written from you actually, it could be something written from anything you trust, but I think it has to be written by someone who knows you. I don't think you can just read shit that people who don't know you have written. I, it just doesn't do anything for me. Um, there's good information there, but it doesn't make me feel differently about myself. So,
Josh (36:49)
Yes.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (37:12)
It's funny if you had that to read, like even if it was a half page, it's like, okay, Gary, you feel like shits going sideways, but X, Y, and Z, you know, do you do something like that mentally? Cause I think, I think you do. I'm just thinking about doing it physically.
Josh (37:26)
Totally. Yeah, I kind of went through the dream scenario thing, like what would I do to shift things that I know that would have taken hours before would have, you know, had me down into 10, 15, 20 minutes or whatever. You know, you talk about putting things simply. It's not something that comes naturally to you or I. The gift and the curse of overthinking and...
You know, having so many thoughts and things come in and being able to, like I said, it's a gift to have so much awareness and this ability to try and navigate through issues. But really what is really effective is coming down to something that's simple, that shifts quickly. And for me, what I do in different moments, that changes from time to time.
what resonates for a couple weeks or a month might not resonate in another month. So it becomes having to rewrite that thing. And I don't always write it. I have written it. I do rewrite it.
Gary (38:27)
Yeah, yeah, tell me. So give me some examples.
Josh (38:31)
I am not my emotions right now. I'm not I am not this experience right now. Or this is something that I'm just experiencing in this moment. In my human body. I'm feeling certain things that are affecting my body and doing breath work and bringing myself up to a higher perspective that's almost like looking down on this.
Gary (38:35)
Okay, so yeah.
That's a good one.
Josh (39:00)
from above and the situation and then you bring that perspective back and you see the room you're sitting in you see the building you're in you see the city you're in you see the country you're in you see the planet you see the solar system and In this process of just breathing and pulling back and letting go coming to a neutrality I think This goes down a whole other
Gary (39:02)
Yeah, yeah.
Josh (39:29)
rabbit hole of beliefs and life after death and whatnot, but I mean I believe that our minds and our emotions stay in our body. They don't go with us. Outside of this physical experience there are no emotions. There's an observation, there's a neutrality, there's energy and that aside it's just like being able to remove yourself from those things just gives you the clear perspective.
Gary (39:49)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (39:58)
And that perspective never fails me. That higher perspective that's detached from the 3D experience of what's going on. Doesn't mean it's not real. Doesn't mean it's not valid. You have to validate it. No wonder you're feeling this thing. You know, of course you are. And giving yourself really on almost every situation, it comes down to giving yourself love and safety and security in that moment.
Gary (40:02)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Yeah, that's...
Josh (40:25)
And when you do that, that's the shift. Yeah.
Gary (40:30)
Yeah, that's, that's hard. Right. It's super hard. Um, you know, it's a difference between you and Josh 20 years ago. There's a big difference probably. Um, so it's, uh, it's definitely, yeah, with you, it's always really powerful that reframing. We've talked about this in the past. It's super powerful. There's a few things you mentioned about it that are, that are kind of classic, you know, it's, um,
Josh (40:34)
Yeah.
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (41:00)
Just focus on what's around you. Just situate yourself in the moment because your world is blinded by this insane flood of self -talk and you don't notice anything. So you gotta kinda, you know, force that, you know, back door open, you know, the kitchen door that had the spring in the past. You gotta keep that open of possibility. And I think situating yourself is awesome. So.
Josh (41:21)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (41:29)
Yeah, that's a super easy but hard reframe. Um, you know what I mean?
Josh (41:35)
It's super hard and especially when the feelings are big and something means a lot to you and really it comes down from detaching from the ego because your mind and your feelings are your ego trying to tell you something and force something. You want something to be different than what you're currently experiencing and when you pull yourself out of it that you know again it's valid and whatnot and these feelings are valid but when it doesn't really
matter when none of it really matters. When you get yourself to that point of neutrality, things level out.
Gary (42:14)
Yeah. Yeah. No, I. Yeah, yeah.
Josh (42:16)
And I think to the other, the other story, the other thing as well, like you said, Josh, 20 years ago, but maybe not like Josh, 37 years ago, or 38 years ago, like children come into this world, and all of this stuff is put is put on us. That's part of this human experience. It's, it's piling on the crap to have to then go through this process of, of shoveling it out and discovery.
Gary (42:28)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Josh (42:43)
And it doesn't feel fun at times. That's why people give up. It's like, I'm just tired of this. I don't want to deal with this anymore. And if you can let go to the point where you can keep moving forward, but letting go, that's just a beautiful, a beautiful place to be in because, you know, it's hard. Our ego doesn't want to let go of that thing. No, it should be this way. No, this was not right. No, I did not deserve that.
Gary (43:11)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (43:12)
You want to make it right, but it is what it is and it's happened. And, and yeah, it is the hard work to, to silence the ego and, and, and, and let it die. Thank the ego for showing you where you need to, where, where it's protecting you, you know, where it's guiding you and showing you something that you maybe need to know and give more attention to. Um, but then eventually.
Gary (43:29)
Mm -hmm.
Josh (43:40)
being able to release it. And the more swiftly and quickly, the sooner you'll experience ease again.
Gary (43:48)
Mm hmm. You know, we're gonna have to wrap up but I just want to really clear up this point.
Josh (43:55)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (43:57)
You know, you talked about the ego and you know, walking into things, right? Awareness. So, you know, it's such a nuanced difference, Josh, from me saying, okay, I'm going to feel everything about where that blockage is. So the ego directed me, I'm feeling it. I'm going through it, but nothing changes when I go through it. Like I'm telling myself the exact same story each time.
Josh (44:04)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (44:25)
nothing changes. There's no transmutation at the end. Right. And what you're saying, it needs a transmutation at the end. There needs to be, you got to nudge that Titanic each time, you know, like it can't just be feeling everything. Um, and just repeatedly feeling the same thing. There's gotta be a bit of work there. And I don't know. I just,
Josh (44:30)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (44:53)
I just find it hard to reconcile. I just find it hard to reconcile the difference between the two. It's not obvious, you know.
Josh (45:02)
Yeah, um...
we talked about time and time, time is a factor. It's one of those things we talked about earlier, too. There is a certain I believe a certain amount of reflection that needs to go into doing the discovery of where certain beliefs originated that create negative feelings of resistance that create blocks that, you know, create these walls that you keep.
ending up hitting. And with time, I think the transmuting does become quicker and quicker in specific areas. And there might be a new area that pops up, like that's this human experience, something else will happen that you need to kind of, oh, geez, I'm starting at square one here. So I think having that patience that yes, sometimes it does take nudging that Titanic bit by bit.
But while you're doing that, here's the reframe key is that I'm experiencing the reality that I desire right now as you're nudging it, that Titanic is no longer in sight as you're nudging it. And it's right there. That sun is yeah, that sun is going to rise in the next hour when it's 12 PM or 12 AM. Right. Um, that helps your perception of time and your internal reality shift.
Gary (46:11)
right. You're envisioning the North Star. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Josh (46:29)
And, and that's again, where when you've done that, done that reframing focus, it comes back down to the being and the presence that puts you in the positive moment that are in the present moment that, um, that helps facilitate that positive shift.
Gary (46:50)
agree. Maybe the Coles notes, maybe the equation of this is intention, you know, to the power of your North Star.
Josh (46:55)
Mm -hmm.
Gary (47:02)
times time.
is essentially the equation for you making those mind shifts for you overcoming limiting beliefs. It's let's get the North Star down. Let's have the intention to really understand what I think evolution looks like for me. And then I just give it time. I just give it time. I focus at park and, and, and that's what gives me that instant. When things go a bit sideways, that's the no, no, this is who I am. It just hasn't happened yet.
Josh (47:19)
Mm -hmm.
Yeah. And I think the thing that I'm working on also though, right now is what was it time? What was it with the time plus time or what, what was it?
Gary (47:43)
basically, intention to the power of your North Star times time.
Josh (47:47)
Okay. So I would also times time, I don't, I'm man, I'm horrible at math, but what would you do times time divided by time to cancel out time in the end? Because in the end, what we want to do is actually have the perspective knowing, okay, knowing consciously that it is going to take time. It's in the equation, but you also want to cancel it out. You know, you want to stop looking backwards.
on the past and stop focusing on it so much that I'm wounded, I'm unhealed, I have all this work to do. I mean, you need that awareness, you need that to start. And what I'm trying to do that is get rid of that now so that this is the present moment, that's all that matters. Screw the rest of it. Sure, it might take some time as well, but I don't know how much...
Gary (48:13)
Mm -hmm.
Okay.
Okay.
Red.
Josh (48:34)
time it takes or in this physical reality, it's infinite as well. So if time is also infinite, it doesn't exist. This has been the thing for me because I've always had this issue of feeling like, oh, there's not enough time to do everything that I want to do. So yeah, that is something that I'm diving into that has helped me have more success in this whole area is perception of time in itself as well. Yeah.
Gary (48:37)
Mm -hmm.
Yeah. So maybe the, the equation gets quite complicated actually, because I was just thinking about over time, over time, you're going to go from not dividing by time to progressively divided by time. So time will, will, will become less and less relevant as time goes on. That's the, that's, that's the Ouroboros. So you just don't know what that curve looks like. And ideally you would have something where that
Josh (48:59)
Yeah, we'll go back to it.
Yes. Yes.
Gary (49:24)
that happens in fairly short order. I think there is a certain tipping point, there's a certain virality to how often you think that way with how often you're gonna start to think differently. So I think there is a virality. So they typically say about 25 % penetration in a community. So let's say your brain's a community. So 25 % penetration of this new way of thinking will then become theoretically self -fulfilling. So that's an interesting thing to believe.
Josh (49:36)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm.
Gary (49:53)
whatever that means tangibly, I don't know. But it means that there's an option. So I think it's a good place to leave things, you know, limiting beliefs, you know, there's no better guy to chat about that, Josh. And I think, I think the moral of the story is, we definitely aren't our beliefs. We aren't those and I love your reframes. I love how you look at time and yeah, I'd love to leave it at that.
Josh (50:14)
Mm -hmm.
Yeah, I was gonna and I think to add to that as well, like I've been doing limiting beliefs work, but something that's come to me recently is how that's is ironic in itself, because just the word limiting isn't a high vibration positive word, right? So when we when we when we name this podcast, we'll come back to something different, because I've just been going through the idea of what is a
Gary (50:39)
Exactly.
Josh (50:50)
better way to describe this journey and this process, which yes, is shifting limiting beliefs to something else, something more positive, really tapping into unlimited potential and, you know, just greater alignment and peace. And yeah, it's the beautiful journey. And I love these chats always with you.
Gary (51:10)
Maybe we call it questioning beliefs or noticing beliefs. Actually, maybe it's about noticing beliefs. You know, we don't want to label a belief. As soon as we label it as limiting. I agree with you. As soon as we label it as limiting, that's fucking horrible, man, because now I'm going to see my potential as limited just in thinking that I have a limited, a limiting belief. It's horrible. I agree. So I think it's noticing beliefs.
Josh (51:27)
Mm -hmm.
Yeah. I think, I think noticing is step one, but then and then it's and then it's shifting, refocusing, redirecting beliefs like that is that is the action that is the process. And for me, and you know, the work that I like to do with helping people is, is ultimately coming back to a greater alignment with yourself, greater alignment with your true authentic self.
Gary (51:41)
and then shifting.
Right on.
Josh (52:05)
where there isn't resistance and there are no limits, right? Anything's possible and yeah, that's the good spot to be in.
Gary (52:11)
Oh nice. It's like an...
It's like a universe perspective, no limiting beliefs, lose the noun, focus on the verb. That's the, that's the moral of the story today. Lose the label. Let's focus on that like five step process to start reframing things. You know what, brother? It's always a pleasure. I think this is super key. It's an ongoing conversation. So we'll do a few more like this, but thanks for coming up. All right, brother.
Josh (52:41)
Thanks, man.
